Tuesday 13 November 2012

Cambodia Trip - Monday, Day 1


 Monday morning I was awake, bright and early, at 04h00! My poor body was obviously a little confused! Too many time zone changes over the last couple of weeks! I spent the time sorting photos from the Brazil trip (I haven’t had a chance to do so yet), and listening to an excellent sermon by Graham Cooke entitled ‘Living from the Place of Dreaming’. Well yeh! That is kind of what I have been doing this last year, so I could relate to it.

Our day started with breakfast, and it was hard to contain my delight when Narith, Sambo and Lay arrived. They had been our interpreters on our last trip, and I had grown to love them a lot. I forgot all about cultural norms and protocol and hugged them all. What a crazy version of an Englishwoman they have to relate to! Not much in the way of reservation there. Blame a good dose of South African culture and friendliness for that!

Breakfast over we went to the XP centre for our planning session. I discovered that I would be going with Andrea to one of the high-end brothels. There was a slight possibility that this was where Siem, the young woman with whom I had connected so powerfully on our last trip, had been sent. So I was hopeful. As it turned out, none of the people to whom we spoke knew of her.

At the brothel we were ushered into a Karioke room, and the attendant thoughtfully set up the karaoke with English songs so that we could sing while we were waiting. We had fun, singing all sorts of ‘golden oldies’, and finishing off with ‘Stand by Me’, which was kind of appropriate. Eventually the mamasang arrived, along with three young women. I always find it difficult, looking into these young faces, and knowing what they are subjected to every day. Sophy interpreted for one half of our group, and they ended up with the mamasang and one of the girls. We had Samnang, and the other two girls. We asked them to tell us a bit about their lives. One was a mother of a son, and her husband had left her, so her son was being raised by her parents in a far away province of Cambodia. She had come to Poipet to find work so that she would be able to provide for her family.

The other, 22 years old, had also been driven into this life by economic pressure – she had parents who were old and not well, and she had to earn money for them. They knew only that she had found work; they did not know what kind of work. I couldn’t help but think of my own 22 year old, who, just four days before, had graduated from her university, a life full of hope and beauty and promise ahead of her. In contrast, what was there for this pretty young woman? What room for dreams and aspirations? At worst, rape and abuse and HIV. At best, multiple sexual encounters with strangers. And what can we really do? Other than offer an hour of our time, paid for, in which we ask nothing from her, but offer her the comradeship and compassion of womanhood, and the love we have received from our God? It kind of breaks one’s heart.... but I am learning to live with brokenness. This, after all, is exactly how Jesus lived on this earth – embracing pain and suffering and distress, absorbing it into His own vast love. In my case too, I am learning to allow the pain through and onward, into Him.

After lunch, we had a training session with Bart. Which was very good, except that looking at me, you might not have thought so. My early start had caught up with me, and I was finding it exceptionally hard to keep my eyes open. I realised the severity of my problem when, looking down at my notes, I realised that I had written half a sentence with lucidity, but that things had then tapered off into an unrecognisable scribble!

At 15h00 we set off to the HIV village, so-called because many of the inhabitants (men, women and children) are HIV-positive. Earlier in the week members of the team had packed up food parcels – rice and fish and salt and oil - to take with us. It was an exceptionally bumpy drive along dirt roads to get to the village. Along the way there were many small children, dogs, chickens and cattle. We kept shouting – probably unnecessarily - to our driver to ‘Watch out!’. It was a bit nerve-racking, and we were glad when we arrived.

Immediately we were surrounded by a crowd of children. While our team leaders spoke with the village overseer, and planed how best to distribute the food to people, the rest of us had fun with the children. Jeremiah got them playing games that included actions, and then one of our interpreters led them in singing. The children surprised us completely with a clear rendition of ‘Head, and Shoulders, Knees & Toes’!
I had brought stickers and bubbles with me, and I began sticking stickers on a few of the children’s t-shirts. Within a short while there was a queue of children, waiting for stickers. What always touches my heart, here in Poipet, is how the older children push the little ones forward to get what is being offered, even at the risk of not getting anything for themselves. I gave a few bottles of bubbles to other team members and we began blowing them. Some children wanted to blow bubbles too, while others enjoyed catching the bubbles. Small things, simple things, but with the power to give a lot of joy. Malina came over and offered to take a few photos for me. While she was doing this, one of the children came running over to her and wrapped her arms around her. Malina just stood and hugged her for a long time. It was like watching a love tank being filled.
We handed out the food packages we had brought and asked if anyone wanted prayer. A lot of people did, and so we went from person to person and prayed for them. I ended up with two precious old ladies – I couldn’t understand them and they couldn’t understand me, but we smiled at each other and held hands and smiled some more, and I saw, yet again, that there is language we speak without words. They gave me so much honour. Yet again I found myself wanting to cry. They, out of what little they had, were giving gifts to me; older women to a younger woman. This kind of thing keeps happening – I came to Cambodia to give, but I find that I am the one receiving.

When the children noticed the camera in my hands, they came running. They love to have their photos taken. It is such a delight to them to see themselves in a photo, and digital technology has made this possible. After a while they began pulling funny faces and then when I showed them the picture they just laughed and laughed and laughed. It was very funny. All too soon it was time to go. As I turned to leave there was a little girl holding onto me. I looked down and she was smiling back at me. So I picked her up – she was as light as a feather. I hugged her and she smiled proudly at the children on the ground, and then looked at me, and smiled again. She was completely wonderful. I asked Narith to take a photograph of me with her, but it was just not possible, because the moment he lifted the camera to his face children crowded in front of us to be in the photo too. We tried a few times and then I just gave up and accepted that I would not get a photo just with her. I hugged this little girl again and as I did so, I was just overcome with love for her, so I kissed her on the cheek a couple of times and she smiled even more. I absolutely did not want to put her down again, and it was hard to do so. But by now I was being hugged by three other little bodies, so I leaned down and kissed them too. Such delight! Oh my goodness.... is it this easy to make a little child happy?
Driving back in the van I felt overwhelmed. Everyone was talking about what a wonderful time we had had and how great the people were to relate to and what a good thing it was to be able to give food and so on, but I felt like I had left my heart behind... it took a while to catch up with me.

I am glad to discover this amazing thing about hearts.... that they just expand and expand and expand to contain all the people God gives us to love. We never run dry, because His love is never-ending; there is always a new supply. And so I find that I can care about each one that comes across my path. This is a tremendous thing, and I feel privileged indeed to be discovering it.

In the evening we decided to take some time off. So we went to one of the Casino’s and bought Frappe’s and ice creams at a shop that was very much a copy of Starbucks; it made us laugh. It was a lovely evening of chatting and getting to know other members of the team. And then it was back to our hotel, where I planned to write this update, but as I said earlier, I fell asleep on the job. 

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